Friends on a email list passed around this clever little blood-curdling link yesterday. It’s a story from the BBC about an outbreak of a disease that actually reanimates the dead for a few hours! Freakin’ ZOMBIES, man!
The news created a stir among my genre-loving friends…until I had to be a know-it-all spoil sport and ruin everyone’s fun by pointing out the tell tale signs that the story is a hoax and is not hosted on the BBC site at all.
I immediately regretted my actions as my friends, one Chad Derdowski among them, crashed down from the natural high one experiences when one learns that zombies are real.
So, I created this page to assuage Chad’s broken heart and disillusioned mind…
HEY! That engineer guy who gave the directions to the zombie place? i followed your damned directions and i hope you had yourself a nice little kick and giggle from my waste of a fucking time “Real life zombie holiday experience” (i named it myself, wata ya think?) you my friend, nay, time for pleasantries is over, my mortal enemy are A DESPICABLE, LYING, STINKING EXCUSE FOR A HUMAN BEING. You owe me 3 and a half weeks of my life and ill be god damned if i aint gettin em back. I hope you rot in hell where your soul will b endlessly torn to shreds by slow zombies, then fast zombies, then those rare zombies that seem to b able to use their bodies like everybody else and finally by every BOSS zombie you could ever imagine. But your not worth the time mate.
also, i noticed some CIA and scientists posting about their experiences. Thanks for sharing guys, those stories are pretty crazy, so crazy in fact, that i have no other choice but to believe them. And just a little pointer, being in the CIA, being a scientist often requires consistent spelling and grammer at least so that all of what you’ve written is easily deciphered without mild tribulations such as childish literacy mistakes. From Fat Cat scientists and CIA agents I’d of expect better.
I suppose to conclude, who’s to say anything’s impossible. from zombies to a civilised society ( O no he di’ent ) Not just because we as human beings could quite easily know shit all about anything of the big picture from our world to the whole universe. Lastly, if the universe is infinite, then that must mean that there’s an infinite amount of, lets say, possibility of life which must mean there’s an infinite amount of tiny chances that a zombie holocaust could happen which in turn would mean that some where out there at least 1 must of had the perfect conditions to make zombies a reality in fact i woulkd say it means theres an infinite amount of zombie outbreaks out there. well, sorta. WOULD an infinite amount of monkeys with an infinite amount of type writers and time be able to write the works of Shakespeare? Or would they just use the paper to wipe their arses for the rest of eternity? I dont know, i haven’t got the patience and im goin g to bed.
P.S there are a lot of crazy ass people commenting here.